When I’m very hormonal, the emotional side of life ends up overblown and distorted – like looking at myself and all of life in a fairground mirror. Any situation that could possibly be decided by a win or a loss feels hugely stressful when normally I’m a happily competitive person – especially when competing against myself. I usually enjoy seeing the results of a well-journalled eating day and it’s not the least bit stressful to see the feedback offered by the Nutracheck site. Have I got in my 5 a day, limited the alcohol, drunk enough liquid? Are the calories on track for a slimmer and healthier me? Is my fat consumption within a healthy range? Have I exercised?
But when my emotions are raw-edged, that feels like a huge amount of pressure and a ridiculous way to spend my life. So yesterday I decided to put my journal aside for the day in order to listen to what my body was asking for and it went pretty well. I ate well, tried small portions and had more if I was still hungry and drank when I was thirsty – kind of what I imagine life will be like for the rest of my days! Untethering myself from the journal gave me a much needed break and giving myself permission to journal or not for this crazy week makes me feel that I might do it anyway.
Have I just discovered that half my weight loss battle is caring for the rebel within? We’ll see……..
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