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I didn’t notice #150 passing by so thought I’d pause to celebrate this milestone.  (pause, celebrate)

I got my hospital appointment for April 1st – two weeks from tomorrow.  I was doing pretty well up to that point but now I just feel sick.  Silly, really, because nothing is better or worse than before.  Whatever is or isn’t wrong with me still is or isn’t wrong.  In my logical world I get that.  But in my crazy head, I still feel worried.

Deep breaths.

I stumbled over this BBC article from a couple of weeks ago.  In my limbo state, this is exactly the kind of certainty that I would like.

  • swab
  • test
  • You should eat this amount of protein and this amount of carbs and this amount of fat for maximum, effortless (I added that – it’s my fantasy) weight loss.

Simple.

I need simple right now.

I’m off to London for a couple of days.  It’s work but it should be distracting.  The husband is coming with me  – mostly because I don’t think he likes the idea of me careening down motorways at 80 mph when I’m stressed.  I have pointed out that I did it last week just fine but I’m happy for the company.  (And, actually, my driving was a bit loopy last week but I haven’t told him that.)

I’ve rebelliously put together a one hour workshop that does not contain even one powerpoint slide so I’m going to leave my laptop at home and read a book if I have any downtime.

Till the weekend then.

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